Going "General"

Hello everyone! I was Hopeandfaith back on the other place. My journey has grown since starting there and I would absolutely say I am 100% a different person. There's just something about having control over your emotions that changes you, particularly when you are an emotional person like me!

Anyway, when I began my journey with LOA, all I wanted to manifest was my ex back (cue groaning). I tried everything, eventually finding myself in the wrong hands, and only getting more and more desperate despite learning about Neville and his band of Merry Men (and Women). It didn't work out, mostly because I learned to trust my intuition on how scummy my ex was and how I, in fact, had fallen out of love with him long before the break-up. I was just clinging to something "familiar." Eventually, I just shut myself off from all social media to give me plenty of time to heal properly and be ready for "the one."

When I was ready, I decided to take an Abe approach and just go general. I visualized for a good while, putting everything I wanted in my next relationship into that one visualization, and then just wound 'er up and let 'er go. A couple days later, I met the love of my life at my new job. A few weeks after that, we started dating, and well, here I am. It's been a year and a half since the day I started out and I could not be more thankful for where heartbreak led me!

So! I truly think going general helped me get out of my own way, but I'm not sure how useful it is for others. What are your stories and experiences with using that particular "technique."

Hey Havefaith, so good to see you, and its lovely to hear about your Journey, i'm glad it all worked out for you by going general.

I find a mix of both helps with me, sometimes i will focus on something specific, but others i do like to just go with it and see what happens x

(ManifestWithArmine)

Hi Hopeandfaith, thank you for sharing your story with us,

Great story HopeandFaith!

I wish Mr. Brightside would read your post, I think it would put a smile on his face after his rough week lol

Hell, I wish more ex-back people would read this.

I was actually going to start a thread on "going general" a few days from now, but you beat me to it (almost thought of putting it in the LOA Models for Newcomers Thread). Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but "going general" doesn't mean just visualize and let go. I think "going general" just means that if you focus on a specific desire that you want, but it makes you feel doubt and fear, then change your thought to a more general one that makes you feel better.

Essentially, you just want to go after the feeling behind what you ultimately want, so just think thoughts that put you in that feeling. Let's say you really want to attract love and you have a specific person in mind, but thinking of that person makes you doubt your ability to be with them. So don't think about that person, instead maybe listen to love songs, think about being with a celebrity crush, and get into the feeling of having love already. And then that should attract the reality you want. It kind of makes sense since I'm sure many of us attracted things without even visualizing it or thinking about it, yet it was all lined up with our feelings and/or beliefs.

I don't think this is incompatible with Neville since all he asks really is that you assume the feeling of your desire fulfilled. In a way, "going general" also does that, just choose thoughts that bring you to the ultimate feeling behind what you want. But of course, that most common reason (or excuse) for why people fail with Neville is that they either didn't have enough discipline and persistence or they lacked faith. (Did Neville actually write that you must have subconscious faith to attract your desired reality, or did he just say that you need to assume the feeling of the wish fulfilled?).

I think doubt and fear can be resolved with right thinking, like analyzing the roots of your fear and seeing opportunity in it. For example, you fear being rejected if you actually apply for your dream career. That fear was caused by thinking wrong about failure and rejection, so just think of failure and rejection as good things that you can learn from (easier said than done, it requires discipline). If you fail, maybe you can still use this time "away" from your dream career to do fun things, work on another passion, and develop your skills at the same time, so there really is no loss, only everything to gain. Once your dominant thought pattern to failure and rejection changes and the fear of it dissipates, it's a lot easier to visualize. So it's about changing the perception. Same if you're afraid that the person you really want to be with doesn't want to be with you. So what if they don't? You can use the time apart to find happiness on your own, catch up with friends, enjoy life, get more career success, and do something really fun and passionate. With that understanding, the fear of being unhappy without them can die out or lose power. With that fear dying, it's easier to visualize. This reminds me of two things:

1) In Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich, he said that fear of the loss of love is very common and we get over it by deciding not to worry about love and recognizing that we can get along without love since love is always coming and going. Basically, just because you lose love doesn't mean it won't come back, be it in the specific person you want or someone else, so there's nothing to be afraid of.

2) Willow shared with me an Abe-Hicks video where he/she said that instead of focusing on "Why aren't they here yet?" we should make the process of being without them and getting them back so enjoyable that we don't even want it to end. That clears our focus/vibration to receive them (not completely sure).

About visualization and letting go, Neville fans will say that we only need to let go of our doubts and fears (not our desire), and we just do that by building faith, we build faith with the right thought pattern and visualizing consistently (which I agree with). Also, getting into that relaxed state of mind before visualizing should help clear the mind of anxiety. But I find that if I visualize consistently enough, eventually a feeling of having it already will take over, and then I just can't be bothered to visualize it or think about it anymore. I feel tired of thinking about it and it leaves my mind. I "let go" of the technique. And then usually what I want will manifest soon after, although I'm not consciously expecting it. Looking back at the best moments of my life, I think "going general" has felt more natural to me. Whenever I just focused on feeling a certain way, I attract things that match up with the feelings behind the thoughts I'm putting out. Of course, results might be sporadic, and you may not get that specific thing you originally wanted, but maybe sometimes that's a good thing.

Also, I found this, might be of interest:

“Here’s the rule of thumb:

If you get really specific, enough that you activate your awareness that it’s not where you want it to be, it’s counter-productive visualization.

If you visualize generally, enough to just make yourself feel happier, it’s very productive visualization.”

— Abraham

Hi PR! I actually got the idea from him many months ago after it piqued my curiosity! And you're right, "going general" doesn't mean letting go, I kinda muddled them together! At first, I only visualized on general feelings of love, fulfillment, and all the good things I would have felt while in that relationship of my dreams. After I kind felt it out and felt really good, I just dropped it and trusted that everything I wanted was coming my way!

See, the thing with Neville is a lot of people forget that he says you don't have to fall asleep after. In fact, that was one thing I had a serious contention with with that poor teacher of mine, because I had a hard time actually falling asleep while visualizing. But, some people just can't stand to be corrected. Most of the letting go I did was during the day. I'd think about it every now and then, but it wasn't an anxiety. Just something I knew was heading my way!

Havefaith wrote:Most of the letting go I did was during the day.

I think this is really a good point. I find that most people set time aside to "manifest" what they want. Like 10 min a day to meditate or visualize, or a little time in the morning to think about what they want or before bed. Thats all fine, but it doesnt nearly compare to when that is your state of mind/being 24 hours a day.

You move from visualizing it, to actually being it.... its no longer something you are "working" towards but actually something you are already experiencing. Essentially you changed the scenario, by changing yourself you changed your reality.... which must then reflect itself in the outside world.

Congrats on the manifestation

Mr.Brightside wrote:

I think this is really a good point. I find that most people set time aside to "manifest" what they want. Like 10 min a day to meditate or visualize, or a little time in the morning to think about what they want or before bed. Thats all fine, but it doesnt nearly compare to when that is your state of mind/being 24 hours a day.

You move from visualizing it, to actually being it.... its no longer something you are "working" towards but actually something you are already experiencing. Essentially you changed the scenario, by changing yourself you changed your reality.... which must then reflect itself in the outside world.

I feel a strong connection to you both right now. We all get it. This is what we're bringing to the world. So awesome. Who else here knows from experience exactly what Havefaith and Mr. B are talking about?

Thanks so much for sharing your story with us Havefaith!! We need more stories like that.

Still chuffed that PR mentioned how Mr B would love this thread and then the next moment he was here. Super-swift manifestation. Nice to have you around Mr B.

President Roosevelt wrote:1) In Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich, he said that fear of the loss of love is very common and we get over it by deciding not to worry about love and recognizing that we can get along without love since love is always coming and going. Basically, just because you lose love doesn't mean it won't come back, be it in the specific person you want or someone else, so there's nothing to be afraid of.

Well yes exactly. Almost everyone who wants love...er...is stuck wanting love. Once you get to just being love, realising there's nothing that you need from the outside, relationships just happen.

"You want to be loved because you do not love; but the moment you love, it is finished, you are no longer enquiring whether or not somebody loves you." - Krishnamurti

Though PR, I think I remember that you saying that you should still have that desire - to be loved? I suppose for me, it's the difference between "wanting" (and being stuck in the mindset of lack) and realising that you already have love, and simply attracting more of the same. I think that's what I believe, my mind is open.



Long ago, long long ago, I had a conversation with a certain Colonel we all know and love who agreed that when you're feeling full of love in yourself, like ... a full cup,* overflowing... and don't need anybody's love....that's the time you're the most attractive, that's the time you attract love and it just comes to you naturally, when you don't need them.



The moment there's need in it, there's fear of losing it, and when you fear losing it...   the love cannot glow as bright.

Actually I couldn't remember any other place I read that Krishnamurti quote, so I had to go back to my copy of Laurence Boldt's The Tao of Abundance. He includes it in the context of abundance, not separating yourself from all the love in the universe, from the happy couples all around you and happy families too... same goes for money (which is...exactly like love *cough*), he says don't divide yourself from money, don't think about the lack, see yourself as...one with money...  Boldt also talks about the subconscious beliefs a lot of us have about money, that it's hard to get, etc.

Actually speaking of money - Alan Watts prefers to talk about wealth, which he sees as different from money:

https://www.brainpickings.org/2014/05/29/alan-watts-on-money-vs-wealth/

Back to going general (we've even had limiting beliefs in this post, oops)...a lot of my favourite LOA advice goes like this: "Be happy, supercharged with happiness, and you'll find that miracles start manifesting in your life."

And at the end of the day, - I guess it doesn't much matter which specific miracles those might be.



_______________________________
*when I talked about a full cup he said, "I assume you mean a full-cup bra, right?"
...good old Colonel. Back then he shocked me no end.

I find it hard to be specific, so i prefer to keep general, otherwise i end up miserable.

but then on the other hand i'm aware somethings i need to be specific about such as my career, and erm, getting over my fear of driving which right now conflict, as i need to drive to get a job in my career.

where do you find the balance?

SelinaM wrote:
*when I talked about a full cup he said, "I assume you mean a full-cup bra, right?"
...good old Colonel. Back then he shocked me no end.

I still have a few tricks up my sleeve

Night Eyes wrote:I find it hard to be specific, so i prefer to keep general, otherwise i end up miserable.

but then on the other hand i'm aware somethings i need to be specific about such as my career, and erm, getting over my fear of driving which right now conflict, as i need to drive to get a job in my career.

where do you find the balance?

Best of luck with your licence night eyes, I was a late bloomer with mine, if I can get mine, seriously anyone can get theirs.
I was the biggest nervous wreck ever when it came to driving, driving lessons with a really good patient instructor was the way to go for me.

As far as balance goes, go by how it's making you feel, if you get too specific you literally feel the resistance, it will feel a bit icky. When you go more general, you will feel relief
PR you crack me up lmao

Waves hi to Mr B.

Aw Willow Thank you, i wish it was a case of just getting my license, but i passed my test 12 years ago, i havent driven for the last 7 or 8 of them, i literally cant even think about getting behind the wheel, because it turns me into a nervous wreck, i've tried so many things to get over this i just want my career without needing to drive.

Well... Have you thought about counselling online? I've been studying counselling for the past 12 months, as well, but I no longer want to go into that area anymore. When I started my course I found a site where you could offer your service and get paid for it, I'll have a look and see if I can find it for you.

yeah i'm training to be a counsellor myself, also had counselling and cbt for it, tried immersion therapy, but i just end up sorting everything else out and avoiding that lol

i even know my limiting beliefs and anxieties about it, it's just a nuisance more than anything, i'm quite happy not driving, i just would like to stop it from crossing over into my career x

Lol I understand, well there are heaps of ways around it, I worked without a drivers licence for many years, am glad I drive now, but with loa everything and every situation has a workaround, it's only a problem if you allow it to be beśt of luck with it, any particular area you would like to work in?

I haven't chosen a style of counselling yet, although i do prefer the person centred approach, but whatever i do i will be going into Domestic Abuse support

I will sort the driving thing out eventually, just not erm right now lol

Thanks for the Help Willow, you're right its only a problem if i allow it x

Your very welcome, <3 if you ever feel like a chat about counselling etc feel free to pm anytime.
I was looking at the same area to go into, either that or school counsellor, I like working with kids, especially those from a tough background.
You'll get there, I can see from a lot of your posts you would make a great counsellor, need more people like you in the industry

I'm scared of driving, too, but only of roundabouts really...

...and traffic...

...and parking....



I don't think it's something I'd need counselling on any more than my fear of talking on the phone (I have a little-girly voice), it's just me getting anxiety in general...  

President Roosevelt wrote:

SelinaM wrote:
*when I talked about a full cup he said, "I assume you mean a full-cup bra, right?"
...good old Colonel. Back then he shocked me no end.

I still have a few tricks up my sleeve

Aww no you don't sweetie, not really, you're a teddy bear.







(runs off before he can catch her)

Haha, I can't believe we're all scaredypants when it comes to driving I wish they had public transportation in Florida

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Havefaith, such a great story and thank you for sharing I myself am a big go general fan, but when I do have a very specific thing I want to manifest in mind, I go "this or better" route. Meaning "Hey Universe- I want this! But if you know of something like this that is EVEN better, but I can't see it from my current point of view, then by all means, I am also open to upgrades"

Lol "upgrades" that's a great way to word it.

Scared of driving? No no, not me! I wrote down in the thread of dreams that I want to be a formula one driver or maybe wanted, since I'm getting a bit old.

LittlemissSunshine wrote:Scared of driving? No no, not me! I wrote down in the thread of dreams that I want to be a formula one driver or maybe wanted, since I'm getting a bit old.

Haha, I remember you saying that! You should give us all lessons on driving confidence And what is that limiting belief about age? Nooo, never too old for that